A good day….

Yes, it's Friday.  I guess that means it automatically qualifies as a "good" day.

But it's more than Friday and it's more than any other 'good' day.

It's a good day for healing.

Maybe you're already in the process of healing.  Maybe you're recovering from a recent loss and feel like you don't know the first thing about starting to heal.  Well, today is that day.

I've been in the process since August of 2008.  It's not an easy task, I promise you that and it's a life long project too.

I've come to understand that healing is like grieving: it is done in stages and it takes forever to accomplish.

The first phases are so hard.  They hurt and they are slow to scab over.  You never really think you'll come out of the depths of such sadness, but you do, eventually.  The weight of the pain eases ever so slightly and when you feel that weight lift, that's the healing taking over.

We all heal at a different pace, so don't compare yourself to a friend who's been through a loss and don't let anyone, professional or otherwise, tell you there's a certain window of time etched out in a book somewhere that tells you how long you have to heal.

Just grab a day, like today.  It's a good day to start: a good day to begin the healing.

 

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Kathie Scott April 25, 2014 at 6:24 pm

I couldn't agree more Laurie. I hate it when people say someone needs "closure" because I don't think that's possible. Most of us heal in small increments at different speeds. I work in law enforcement and we had the most tragic incident last week that we live through..an accidental death of a small child. I have been thinking for a couple of years about joining the critical incident stress management team and the debriefing from this incident cemented that decision for me. I knew my pay it forward spot would hit me someday. Helping others heal will,no doubt, help me in my journey.

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Maureen (Mo) April 25, 2014 at 2:58 pm

I've been off the grid this week, for good reason: I've been in New York City, where I participated in a poetry reading. I read "Garden" (from "Neruda's Memoirs: Poems"), dedicated to all of you here. I mentioned Leroy and how the poem came to be written.

Much earlier that day, I found myself in a group talking about loss and catastrophic illness. Usually I'm able to speak about my brother now without crying. That morning, though, I couldn't. Perhaps it was because May 5, the day my brother died, is so close. I said that what people don't understand about such a loss is that love doesn't stop, that relationship goes on, that without our hearts we couldn't love and wouldn't be able to heal. I still say I have two brothers and four sisters and they are all equally with me.

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