First things first…Al…you know we are all keeping a good thought in our hearts for you and your wife. It is wonderful news to hear she is improving. Hour by hour, we can only hope that continues.
Laurie Hirth…where have you been? What a great surprise to “see” you here. Isn’t it great that our group continues to grow, but we have our core, those who rooted in this community years ago and stick with us. I appreciate every single one of you, more than you know.
Actually, Laurie used an interesting phrase in her post…the “friends we never met.” I guess we are that, but we have helped each other through so much cancer chaos over the years, I’ve always felt we really have met, at the toughest turning points in our lives.
It makes me wonder about all the times we’ve passed strangers on the street, in the grocery store, at the gas station, smiled at them, and for that fleeting moment, connected. Are they struggling in cancer world? Have they visited our community? Should they be a “friend we never met?”
We are a powerful group. Cancer, as horrible as it is, has taught us some great lessons in life. We’re survivors now. We’ve learned to navigate a world that puts up terrible obstacles along the way.
We’ve learned patience and we’ve learned how to conserve our energy for the really tough times, and some of us have a masters in caregiving now. We’ve learned to share too. Especially here, at “Our Cancer.”
As the saying goes, “we’ve gone to school on cancer.”
And we’re friends forever.
April 5, 2011 @ 11:26 am
To be honest, I wish my husband and I had never gone to cancer school. But since you don’t actually choose enrollment, it helps to have places like this to visit, vent and learn. Laurie, I am sorry you have been having such a rough time. I admire that you have stood by so many people in their time of need.
April 5, 2011 @ 9:23 am
“Friends I Never Met”…….I love that phrase. It so describes our experience. And if, and when we DO meet, it is such a joy! And how we grieve when one of us is gone.
Everyone has spoken so eloquently on this subject that there is very little left to say… only that I am very grateful that all of you are here for me…..and I hope that I am always able to be here for YOU!
April 5, 2011 @ 8:41 am
It’s a strange club this one, one no one wants to join (ever) and then once in no one wants to leave. The common thread is the suffering all here have endured and are perhaps still having to endure.
Who else can understand the ravages and humiliations of the disease than those who have been through it?
As Laurie said “friends we never met”, yes, certainly, how could it be anything different?
April 5, 2011 @ 1:02 am
Laurie S..never left, never will….How does one leave and move forward when everything around you reminds you of where you have been? My friend, Art, just passed away last week from Leukemia. My friend Don, now in Hospice in MS and won’t answer his phone when I call because he knows I know where he is at. How do you say good bye to someone that walked that same path with me. His wife found out she had stage 4 lung cancer when Neil did and she survived six months longer. Now Don fights for what remaining days he has left. My friend Linda, also stage 4 lung cancer. I helped her fill a piece of her bucket list, she came to CA and went to the LPGA Tournament and had the best birthday ever. I told her to keep it on her bucket list and come back again next year. Will she? I couldn’t say goodbye….
It doesn’t go away Laurie, the reminders are always out there, sometimes they hit like a brick and other times it just breaks my heart. No matter, I hope I learned enough through my own journey to “pay it forward” as Kim always said. I not on the outside anymore, too many ties to a place that grows some amazing flowers. Keep the garden growing Laurie…there is just way too much beauty to let it fade. It needs the sunshine from all of us! Love and hugs all! LOR
April 4, 2011 @ 7:38 pm
“Friends we’ve never met” ….an interesting phrase but so powerful. I have very few close friends because I try to nurture and cultivate my true friends so I choose to have a close few. My best friends that I have never met are here. I haven’t experienced the closeness anywhere else that we have. And like all true friends some don’t check in for a while and when they do it is as if they never left. Thank you all for being here where I can speak freely and know someone is listening and nobody is judging.
April 4, 2011 @ 7:15 pm
I’ve made so many friends at the hospital that I can’t count them. Those I do remember and I do remember them and their extraordinary care and compassion with a calm and professionalism that made the demons go away. I know their first names but not their last names but I will always remember their efforts to bring order as sometimes chaos reined. Alice, Jessica and Roz let their personalities shine to give Hope where the tubes and wires were pronounced and monitors beeped continuously . When my wife was at her wits end with pain and discomfort, one of them came to rectify the situation and calm her nerves and mine. When my wife was obstinate about getting out of bed to walk, here comes Roz with her big smile saying “Now come on baby, everything is going to be alright. I’m going to help you get through this.” Jessica was the demon slayer..hallucinations reigned for awhile but Jessica could take out her sword of calm and the demons quickly retreated. These nurses and so many more are so special. It reminded me of this place with so many special people who help others new to the cancer world bring some order to the chaos in which they find themselves. Like the nurses in the hospital, we are very good at what we can do and offer to the newbies. I hope that more of them will find their way here.
April 4, 2011 @ 5:47 pm
I had not heard that saying but I can say I wish I could graduate forever from it.
April 5, 2011 @ 1:04 am
I love you MO!