I was at a luncheon the other day attended by people who have been touched by cancer in various ways. Some were being recognized for their good work in the fight against the beast. Some had left their white coats on a hook in the lab and were there to address the group with the latest news on research in cancer world. One doctor called this “the golden age for cancer research.” A bold statement to be sure, but he backed it up with facts and discoveries that link cancer and the genome and how the two are beginning to reveal how closely linked they really are, leading some scientists to develop better treatments for many cancers.
So there she was, sitting next to me. A lovely woman, without a shy bone in her body. We started talking about nothing really…then she mentioned she was not only a survivor of breast cancer, but a three time warrior of the disease.
She was sure her cancer came from hormone replacement therapy. She felt not one lump but two and this came just weeks after her regular check-up. When she’d seen her doctor, she was told her mamogram was clear, but that wasn’t good enough for her. She knew something was wrong and pushed and pushed for more tests. Not only did they find cancer, but two different kinds of tumors in one breast and another tumor in the other breast.
What to do? She listened to the opinions, but more importantly, she began to get educated about her disease. She explained how important that part of the fight was because it gave her an opinion worth listening too. And it helped guide the doctors in their decision when it came to treatment.
She had major surgery. Twice. It was her decision. It was her choice and she said she’s sure she wouldn’t be sitting next to me at the table, if she hadn’t advocated for herself.
“Get educated” is the way she put it. “If cancer comes into your life, get educated.” “Don’t just say yes to the doctors, know as much about your cancer as you can.”
Who could question her logic? She’s living proof of how important it is to be your own advocate in the cancer fight.
I love meeting people like this. They remind me that the will to live, for how ever long, will trump the beast every time.
April 19, 2011 @ 4:13 pm
This is just a reminder that medical care should be a true partnership. Don’t hand over your care to the physician and trust that they will just work a miracle. P.S. Does anyone know if Sasha has found her way to this site?
April 18, 2011 @ 7:48 pm
This topic really stirs up the guilt in me. I was the researcher/advocate for Jim for the most part. I would read until my eyes hurt so bad or my heart hurt so much that I could not continue. When we were told by so many doctors that removing the prostate would be of no benefit we accepted that but I can still hear him saying “I just wish they would take the damn thing out”. We were told over and over that since the cancer had spread into so many areas that removing the prostate would cause him a lot of pain and discomfort for no benefit. I still worry that I didn’t push this issue enough. I know the battle was being fought all over his body but if you have a rotten place on the apple you cut it out and the rest is still good. I can’t help the vision in my mind that the source of this cancer just continued to feed the other areas. Doesn’t necessarily make sense in the scientific/medical world but it does in my head. Know your enemy and you can put up a stronger fight.
April 23, 2011 @ 1:40 pm
Oh Kathie – Wish I could help you keep that guilt at bay … but I do understand it. I think all of us caregivers have those thoughts. Did we do everything possible, did we push back when we should have, did we speak up when we needed to? We did the best we could at the time. I know we did. Now we need to try to do the best we can for ourselves … by pushing any guilt back into those dark corners of our mind where they belong. Hugs to you.
March 31, 2017 @ 1:21 am
Superbly ilntlinauimg data here, thanks!
April 18, 2011 @ 7:14 pm
Terrific advice. Sometimes it is difficult for the patient to do this. Sometimes it falls to the caregiver or another family member or a friend but it is always best to be educated about your cancer. It is empowering. You can also have a conversation with your doctor versus listening to his/her advice or recommendations. The cancer world is a scary place and many don’t wish to know anything other than what they are told. Sadly, this occurs more often than not. I just went through this with my cousin who died from glioblastoma. I researched for him and told him what I found but always reminded him that there is always hope even in the worst situations. He accepted his fate while battling as best he could. The beast killed him in less than 6 months. He was able to prepare, to say goodbye and know that he did his very best in the fight. I was only one of his advocates and he appreciated the facts even though they did not offer any good news.
April 18, 2011 @ 3:15 pm
You can’t always trust the mammograms. I had stage 3 breast cancer with a palpable lump in my breast but the mammogram and ultrasound could not pick it up. Good for this lady for trusting her gut instincts and advocating for herself.