Chemo Brain
Chemo brain.
It’s an awful part of living with cancer. It’s not enough that chemo therapy is so tough on the body. Sure, it kills cancer cells, but while it’s hunting down the bad guys, it’s steam rolling over the good guys too. I’ll never forget Leroy’s blog, “My doctors are trying to kill me.” He talked about wondering what would kill him first, the cancer or the chemo.
Once you get past that part of it, then you’re faced with the side effects of the drugs. I have a friend right now, who is battling some terrible side effects of her chemo. Her cancer is in check. She’s grateful the chemo is working, but the headaches, the diarrhea, the constipation, the nausea, oh how that weighs heavily on the quality of her life. And then there’s the chemo brain.
She says she feels foggy all the time. Clear thoughts are unreachable. Some days complete sentences float out there, in her minds’ eye but that’s where they get stuck. She gets depressed and frustrated and then she starts to wonder, “Is it all worth it?”
That’s the worst part of chemo brain. It’s another low-down trick cancer plays on its’ victims. It plants the “doubt” seed and then steps back and watches it grow.
We’ve talked about quality of life vs. quanity of life many times. I’m afraid my friend will weaken in her resolve to keep up the fight. Her chemo brain could turn off that drive to live.
Cancer and it’s side-kicks…more than any one of us can handle.
May 26, 2011 @ 5:50 pm
“My doctors are trying to kill me” was the first of Leroy’s blogs that I heard. Two of my friends were in chemo for colon cancer and I found the blog to be helpful. I shared his ideas with my friends. I remember Leroy’s remarks about not being able to enjoy milk because he could no longer tolerate cold liquids and who wants to drink warm milk. Then he discovered that chocolate milk was the answer. I passed that on to my friends- who had shared the same experience. I really appreciated Leroy’s blogs when I began my own cancer journey. Thank you for sharing Laurie. I try to check in every week.
May 26, 2011 @ 2:03 am
Quality vs quantity … such difficult choices to make.
I have two co-workers battling final stages of cancer. One has pancreatic cancer and decided to do the every other week chemo treatments. She knows it will only give her a limited amount of extra time, but she’s doing it for those who love her. We held a retirement celebration for her today. 25 years on the job. Lots of love, lots of tears. The other has a very rare, aggressive stomach cancer. No treatment available. Tried a clinical trial but the effects were more than he could handle. He decided today to stop treatment. I hate cancer.
May 25, 2011 @ 6:28 pm
In some ways Jim was so fortunate that he did not have the vomiting and diarrhea so often associated with chemo but he had many other side effects and he hated chemo brain but would laugh at himself for his slips. I hate that he lived in a fog for so long between chemo brain and pain meds but his spirit was always high. Cancer sucks and it’s not fair! It’s motorcycle season and I miss him so much because that was a love of his and I went along for the wonderful rides.