She was almost uncomfortable when I said “Thank you for all you did for Bruce.” She could barely look up with those beautiful blue eyes and wonderful smile. She would greet Bruce that way, when he came for his chemo, now it didn’t seem like the proper response.
I was, just a friend, who had come to tell her how appreciative I was, not just for her skills as a talented oncology nurse but for her human qualities she would express each time he walked into that infusion room. She made his visits to the cancer center less stressful. She became a new friend in Bruce’s last chapter of life.
Her first question to me was “How is Lisa?” How typical is that? Nurses seldom think of themselves. They worry about their patients and they worry about their patients loved ones. But who helps them when a patient, who has been a constant visitor for over a year in this case, suddenly dies? I know she felt the loss.
We all know how unfair cancer deaths are….a life cut short by such an ugly disease….but these nurses live this every day. They know that so many of their patients will eventually die. Shouldering these deaths must be unbearable. Who will help them mourn the loss? I know their fellow nurses are at the ready with an instant supporting wall when necessary, but it’s important that we remember them too.
We all feel loss differently, but we all feel loss. Don’t forget our nurses, they were there for us in our toughest hours.
September 14, 2011 @ 4:54 pm
They feel your pain… I remember one of Neil’s nurses, I didn’t see her often, but when she heard Neil had passed, she came into our room, walked over to me and just held me…and held me tight! I won’t ever forget that moment. She was an Angel, a gift that helped me during my hardest struggle…
September 14, 2011 @ 11:52 am
I have a special admiration for nurses, oncology, hospice, surgical ICU, cardiac ICU, etc. They do very difficult jobs and many that I’ve spoken with seem to “have a calling” for their specialty. They do have feelings that they sometimes express but most often they go about their jobs with great professionalism and care. I go out of my way to thank them personally because they have made a very difficult situation better for me or for my wife. They are truly angels of mercy.
September 13, 2011 @ 8:37 pm
I often told Jim’s nurses that I just didn’t know how they did what they did day after day. I won’t say he loved seeing them each time but they always made him feel special and I know that made his treatments go a little smoother. When you have a difficult job that requires you to deal with human suffering, you become somewhat hardened to their situations but I know these nurses must carry some of their work home. They truly are angels on earth.