Is grief an illness?
Jennifer LaRue Huget writes about it today in the Washington Post. She refers to what she calls a “thoughtful editorial in the British medical journal The Lancet.” The article explores the question and asks if grief should be treated as a medical illness? Meaning, I guess, that medical treatment would be in order, as in medication to treat the grief. Basically, we’re talking some sort of depression.
This topic was raised, as the revised fifth edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders is about to be released. It seems that in the past, a psychiatrist following this manuals guidelines for proper diagnosis of a “major depressive disorder” would question the patient about a recent loss of a loved one and would then decide if the symptoms were connected to that loss.
This manual considers a “normal grief reaction” should not last more than two weeks and after that, categorizes the emotion as depression and suggests psychiatrists treat the post-bereavement grief with antidepressants.
The author of this editorial is not known, but suggests “to treat grief with antidepressants is to deprive the bereaved person of a process that most of us need to go through if we’re to emerge whole and healthy at the other end.” He or she, goes on to say, “For those who are grieving, doctors would do better to offer time, compassion, remembrance and empathy, than pills.”
Man versus manual…..Man wins every time!
February 22, 2012 @ 5:49 am
I was on antidepressants for a while and they did absolutely nothing for me. The pain and the sadness never left me. I still cried and was still unable to sleep. In my opinion, time is the only medication for grief…….however, how long does it take until the pain goes away? Am I going to run out of time?……………….lifting
February 22, 2012 @ 6:45 am
Sasha, I wish someone could give us a timetable but, as we all know, it’s an individual process. I know people who move on and get in relationships in less than a year and others who carry it for the rest of their lives. I think most people carry the grief and sadness but do learn to deal with it in some way so that it doesn’t consume them. Somedays I think I’m doing fine and others not so. I still get angry and sad and just want to be able to hold Jim one more time. Eventhough I cry at the smallest things, I think it helps because I usually pick up and move forward a little afterwards. If I didn’t have my job I don’t know how I would cope. It keeps me busy and I can go in at anytime and either work or just have a nice chat with someone. I wish I had some magic potion for you to make you feel better but please try to do one thing each day that will reflect on what your new life is…you are now an independent woman and all decisions are yours and yours alone. Sometimes a major decision made on my own helps me understand that I have a new way of life and I must deal with it. Please e-mail me anytime you want to talk or vent…we all have such wide shoulders!
February 21, 2012 @ 9:33 pm
This is a discussion my doctor and I have had many times. About 3 months ago we were discussing the fact that I still cried a lot and just couldn’t seem to move forward. She said that after 2 years I had gone from grief to depression so she gave me an antidepressant. Once the pill got in my system I could not cry! During my sister’s illness and death, I barely had any tears. I started weaning myself off and have not had any for 2 weeks at least and I’m back to crying. I will take the emotions anytime. I told her from the beginning that I wanted to feel the sadness and anger and work through it because I’m convinced that you don’t deal with it if you push your feelings back with medication. That’s not to say medication is not appropriate at times because I truly believe it does help some people. Still one of those individual choices.
February 21, 2012 @ 7:27 pm
But..but….but that would require a person to understand grief, the grieving process and to have normal human emotions perhaps as a result of a profound loss! “Let’s see. I have about 15 minutes at most that I can devote to you as a patient. I must then move along to the next person so that I fulfill my patient quota for the day not to mention that my reimbursement from your insurance is only a pittance so I must maximize my time.” This is where we are in many cases. There is no formula for grieving, no mold and certainly no time frames at the end of which a doctor declares that “You’re done. It’s over. So move along.” I agree with the authors of the editorial. I am old enough to remember when doctors, in my neck of the woods, made house calls. If you are fortunate enough to find yourself in the care of a doctor who will sit and listen….not only with his/her ears but with his/her heart as well as medical training, you are blessed. My wife and I are so blessed with several of our doctors. If you find yourself where, in all of your specific situations, you are not being listened to or are being treated as if you are the problem, get another doctor. Even today, the compassionate, caring doctors are out there, just sometimes hard to find.
PS….our internist for 15 years decided to go into a VIP program. A really great doctor. In order to be one of his “select 600 patients”, it required a payment upfront of $1500 for each of us. So he collects $900,000 each year before he ever sees a single patient all in the name of providing better patient care. Each of us must pay the $1500 each year to remain his patient. For some of us, this is just too much while still paying for every visit, all tests, etc. If I were a doc, I’d love this program to REALLY supplement my retirement program….a cool million each year into my IRA..do this for another 10 years….retirement would be really sweet. If you haven’t encountered this, you will.