Some days are just different.   I can’t explain it and I’m not sure I want to understand how they know to be different, but they are.  It’s happened every year since Leroy’s been gone.  These “different” days begin just ahead of his birthday, which was Saturday and they’ll last through tomorrow, which is our wedding anniversary. 

I call it my own personal “hell week.”  These are hard times.  I don’t walk around teary eye’d.  I’m not one to mope.  But something in my chemistry changes.  I”m not as aware…not as sharp as I’d like to be.  I feel like there’s something on my mind and I’m not quite sure how to resolve it.  Does that make sense? 

It’s obvious why I feel this way, but it never fails to sneak up on me. 

Loss is a mystifying emotion.  I’m convinced that once it’s planted in your soul, it’s there forever.  I get that now…so I’ll prepare myself for next year. This change in life has a constant learning curve.

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