She’s a professional woman. She has made her own way in the world for many years and she’s raised a daughter along the way. I’ve known her almost twenty years. What was a business relationship turned into a business/friendship a long time ago, so when she told me she’d been recently diagnosed with breast cancer, I was so sorry to hear the news and offered-up any help I could provide.
The one thing I can’t do is take away the “I have cancer” thoughts that are in her head every minute of the day and night.
“It’s all I can think about.” That’s what she told me today and her tone of voice spoke louder than the words. She’s already exhausted and the hard stuff hasn’t even started yet. She’s still making decisions on doctors. Surgery is in her future and she’s got plenty of questions to ask before that happens. She feels so alone in all of this;like she’s the only one of the planet right now dealing with this awful disease and it’s not because she is alone. There is family and there are friends who are calling, but as you all know, cancer has a way of isolating its victims.
It’s so overwhelming to hear those words, “You have cancer.”
She’s trying so hard not to jump to the worst conclusion, but when she thinks about the future, she wonders what it holds for her? The question mark is growing in her mind by the minute. I try to tell her, she shouldn’t go there, but it’s a silly suggestion. I’ve never known a cancer patient NOT to go there.
Once again, cancer has gone to work; not only in the body of its victim, but in her mind.
I’m not sure where the most damage will be done.
September 13, 2012 @ 7:11 pm
The “mind demons” are terrible. No sleep, lots of night sweats, exhaustion from no sleep, no easy or definitive answers…only what ifs. I’ve done battles with them for quite some time and lost most every battle. The only thing that has changed for me is acceptance of Jesus Christ and prayer. I am today’s prodigal son; wandered for 50+ years in the wilderness (I don’t say this with pride but with humility knowing that I have been forgiven) and finally listened to the inner voice to return to the flock. I did. It has transformed my life. Oh, I still question and wonder about my aches and pains but when my mind starts its chaos, prayer is my sedative and sleep soon follows.
I don’t know if your friend is religious and a Believer, but if they are, use prayer as the sleep aid. Use prayer for the doctor visits, scans, surgeries, infusions, etc. And for every occasion.
Being a Christian and a Believer positions one to be easily ridiculed in today’s media, maybe even a SNL skit or two and certainly the butt of jokes from the likes of Maher and his ilk. While I don’t like it, it doesn’t affect my life or my beliefs in the least. One fine day, judgment will be rendered.
While the old line from WWII- “There are no atheists in fox holes” applied then, perhaps it should also be said that “there are no atheists in infusion rooms.” Cancer has a way of stripping away the very essence of a person and revealing one’s soul. Prayer can soothe one’s soul.
September 27, 2012 @ 5:05 pm
I’ve heard of a lot of different trtnemtaes ranging from eucalyptus to new types of drugs. If you’re interested, you should look into clinical trials. These go on quite a bit and only need a little bit of research to find. The National Cancer Institute should have some pretty good information on how to go about finding them.