I guess as the birthdays pile up (at least it feels that way sometimes) we start to look forward, differently than when we were just starting out in life. Hopes and dreams were different then. Hopes and dreams were REALLY different once cancer took a bow in our lives.
Our plans before cancer included the hope of moving back to the west coast and that would have cut in-half the time it would take to get to Maui!! Work would turn into reaching out and helping others. Leroy’s years in covering conflict would have been a map that would have pulled him back to the places that changed him the most. The places where he saw human suffering so devastating, he made a promise to himself to return some day and make a difference in those countries.
We all make these kinds of plans and many of us live to see them unfold as we phase in and out of the layers of life. It’s supposed to be that way.
But when something like cancer bore’s a hole through this planning page, it’s hard to start the process over again.
A friend of mine was talking today about her five year plan. A FIVE YEAR PLAN!! I don’t look that far down the road any more….there are too many blind curves for me to go there.
I guess once you’ve been hit broadside, the luxury of looking at the future becomes limited to tomorrow; five year plans just aren’t part of the play book any longer.
Who makes plans for that kind of future?