How much can friends push friends with cancer?
I got a call today from a friend who has a friend with pancreatic cancer that has metastasized to her liver. Her prognosis is not good. In fact this person’s doctor told her there really isn’t any more treatment available for her condition.
My friend is searching for a way to help her friend. What to do? She doesn’t want to sit back and do nothing, but at the same time, her friend, the patient is giving off signals that she just wants her friends to be friends, NOT advocates. She doesn’t want her pals to turn to the internet, searching for treatment ideas. She doesn’t want her friends to ask too many questions either.
She’s obviously looking for some peace and understanding.
But my friend is uncomfortable just standing by, watching this cancer explode. She can’t stand that she’s giving this cancer permission to spread without any intervention.
After listening to this story today, and offering up some suggestions, I finally came to the conclusion that this cancer victim has come to a decision about her life and it is her decision.
Friends can be the best friends in this situation by understanding that message and being supportive. It’s not their choice to make.
Some times being a friend means stepping back.