How many times have you heard that sentence from family and friends?
My friend David is hearing it a lot these days because he has suffered a loss and it isn’t that he doesn’t appreciate the sentiment, he just knows, they don’t really know how he feels.
“Why do they say that?” “They can’t possibly know how I’m feeling.”
David recently lost his Mom to Parkinson’s and just a few months later, his Dad, who was suffering from cancer, but had taken care of his wife through her illness, lost his fight against his melanoma. My friend thinks a broken heart and an exhausted soul played a role in his Dad’s death too.
He’s probably right.
So he’s been offered condolences from a lot of friends and family, but when he hears the “I know how you feel,” sentiment, he says no one can possibly know how he feels.
Losing two parents in the span of a few months is a blow to the heart and my friend is hurting right now. I tried to tell him people say a lot of things and they mean well, but right now, there’s not much that will “sound right” even though the feelings are well intended.
Any of us who have suffered loss can sympathize with my pal. He’s taken the first step of a very long healing journey right now.
To tell you the truth, I’m not sure he knows how he’s feeling right now. much less any one else.