How long does it take to “get over it?”
The short answer is “never.”
But there’s a better, longer answer too. You never get over the death of a loved one who worked so hard to live and wouldn’t give in to cancer. So many of us remember those days following our loss, how experts, friends, and family would say, “You’ll be fine. It will take a while, but you’ll get through this.” And you did, ‘ get through it,’ but it didn’t take a few months and it didn’t take a year either. It’s still in process, as they say and will be forever.
I bring this up because today that was the topic of conversation from a friend who lost her Mom years ago and she still feels the pain on certain days when events call-up memories of Mother-Daughter times.
I can relate and I’m sure many of you can too. It doesn’t take a big holiday to feel the grief rise-up. It can be the simplest things: the arrival of Springtime, a Orange Jeep speeding down the road, a quick glimpse of a photograph from a vacation that was special. There are so many things that bring them back to us.
There are no apologies for the feelings either.
How long does it take to “get over it?”
The short answer is “never.”
March 30, 2017 @ 7:04 am
I don’t post much but continue to read the blog whenever I can. It’ wonderful to still see the same friends posting. We go back a long way………I started following the blog with Leroy which I believe was almost a decade ago. My husband had just been diagnosed with terminal cancer. As far as the pain……..It never goes away. There is always that empty feeling. I can be surrounded by a group of people and still feel alone. There are times when I’m driving and have to turn off the radio because a certain song will bring me to tears. Laurie, thank you for continuing to post. As always……….still LIFTING
March 29, 2017 @ 6:28 am
I think I will always have sudden “outbursts” and be brought to my knees by the smallest thing. One can get over many things but the loss of your person is not one of them so we move on an hour or day at a time.
March 28, 2017 @ 7:31 pm
I couldn’t agree more! It’s a pain that never goes away either!
Neils Birthday April 1st and Mid November.. 2 weeks before I lost him.
Each year I wonder what’s wrong with me.. negative, angry, pained, east to cry… each time it takes me a few days when I realize what’s going on… it’s heartache, plain and simple!
March 28, 2017 @ 9:29 pm
It’s in our DNA now Laurie…
Great to “hear” from you.
L
March 29, 2017 @ 7:12 am
Two years after my husband died I met a man who told me his wife had passed away 6.5 years before. “How long does it take to get over the pain?” I asked. “I will let you know,” he replied.
March 30, 2017 @ 1:46 am
I’m never far away… you touched my heart so many years ago…