We mean well, we really do, but sometimes the words just don’t match what we’re trying to convey. This is especially true when it comes to cancer, care givers or even patients. And it can happen during the illness or following the loss of a loved one.
I remember it happening to me and to Leroy more than once. We’d have visitors over who came to cheer him up and tell stories and have a few laughs. All would be going smoothly and then when it was time for them to leave, they’d say something like, “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine,” or “My Aunt Kathy had what you have, she didn’t make it, but you’re a real fighter.”
I’d get the “Hang in there, Laurie” or “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
I would close the door and wonder, WHY would something like that even enter their minds much less leave their lips?
So consider this to be a friendly reminder from someone who has been on the receiving end of some of the most outrageous attempts at “meaning well.”
Think before you speak. That you speak at all says a lot about how much you care and that means a lot to the caregiver or the patient, just think-it before you speak-it.